Things Matt sucks at:
Ballet. Wearing Crocs. BMX stunts. Growing lambchops. Juggling. Aerospace engineering. Playing hopscotch. Baking lasagna. Third base. Being a grammar Nazi. Designing custom designer handbags. Water bottle flipping. Peeling bananas. Moonwalking. Recognizing the difference in Pantone colors 1765 and 1767. Flushing twice. Snorkeling. Drinking six to eight 8oz glasses of water every day. Completing a 5k while doing the electric slide. Successfully cultivating the 3 year asparagus cycle. Going to Mars. Bridal photography workshops. Creating indistinguishable duplicates of fine art. Getting the correct ear pierced. Agitating all air pockets out of freshly poured cement. Standing guard at Buckingham Palace without smiling. Cooking the perfectly poached egg. Ice road trucking from Delhi to Shimla. Eating the FDA daily recommended 25mg to 30mg of fiber. Chewing gum to pop his ears while flying. Making it further than basecamp 5 on his ascent to the peak of Mount Everest. Removing splinters. Writing a compelling screenplay. Carb cycling.
coming soon
